Today's Post: Fake IPL Player

Here is the today's post of Fake IPL player's blog. Have fun.

In Jo'burg now. The plot seems to be thickening. On the flight, Lordie, Bhookha and Skipper were sitting in different corners. No words exchanged between any of them. Bhookha and coach had another round of discussions with Dildo. Apparently, they tried to explain to Dildo how Lordie doesn't fit into the scheme of things anymore. The top four batters will be the phoren brigade, given that Pussy is now with us. And for lower order, we need guys who can run fast, take quick singles and twos. So, Bhookha is of the view that there's no place for Lordie.

Dildo is wary of any more public fury. He has told Bhookha that he is free to take any decision he wants, but if it backfires Bhookha will have to face severe consequences. Skipper wasn't part of this discussion. I hear that Dildo called up Skipper separately and asked for his opinion. Skipper seems to have said that if Lordie doesn't fit in the lower order, he will have to come up and probably even open, if reqd. But there's no question of dropping Lordie. Not sure if Skipper and Bhookha have exchanged notes on this as they have been keeping a certain distance from one another lately. I don't think we have seen the last of this episode.

Bhookha isn't done yet, guys. He has a new friend on the block, none other than the Durbaan of Patiala. Bhookha and Durbaan Ji have lately been SMSing each other more than even Bombay teenaged girls on Virgin Mobile.

News from the Bubblies is that the Prince has reduced Durbaan's role to durbaangiri and nothing more. Durbaan is none too pleased and has been confiding in Vakeel Saab and Lady Jaya. Vakil Saab, who is the favourite huggy buggy, squeeze boy of Babli these days, has relayed the news to Babli. Not that Babli can do much abt it. Bunty controls the ship and Babli doesn't control Bunty anymore.

Anyway, Bhookha and Durbaan are writing a detailed Memo that they'll send to Saala Slimeball and his technical committee for next yr's competition. One of the points being allowing more foreigners in the side. Other points include removal of the icon player concept from next yr itself, reduction of strategy time break, higher level of media gagging, and removal of biased commentators who influence public opinion. (Not sure if FIP is worthy enough to find a place in this new Bible they are authoring). If Bhookha's still reading the blog, I'd like to slip in a couple of suggestions from my side that may dramatically change our fortunes next year. One, allowing overage, underfit players to wear roller skates while fielding. Two, allowing wicket keepers to wear gloves even if when they aren't keeping wickets.

Finally, as they say in English, "Form is temporary, class is permanent". Or, as they say in Hindi "Appam ka Samay aur Chutiya hamesha kat-ta hai". Appam's done it again. First, he messes with a guy twice his size who has just belted him for sixes & fours, and then he goes to Cool Dude asking about his chances of making it to the T20 WC team if the main bowler doesn't recover in time. Cool Dude just laughed it off saying that he doesn't plan on visiting the match referee during the T20 WC.

Match Day tomorrow. You’ll see what’s in store for Lordie.

Till then, adios